Attack of the Zombie Students!

As I stood before my first period class Monday morning, I had an image in my mind of being pursued by my zombie students. You see, Monday was the first day back from a week long "Winter Break." I had anticipated a little bit of sluggish behavior, but not quite what I found...

Me: " How was your week off?"

Silence.

Me: "Anyone? Anything good happen?"

Silence....

Students: "Too short!" and "No!"

Me: "You mean to tell me nobody did ANYTHING worth talking about over your break?"

Students: "It was boring!"

While I didn't let the silence go on too long, I was shocked that my students had nothing good to say. I vaguely remember hearing a massive number of complaints the week before about needing a vacation. Granted, the responses got a little better throughout the day...but overall, the vacation was a bust!

What do you say to students who complain about being in school AND complain about NOT being in school?

So as I continued to ask each class of zombies how their week off was, I laughed to myself...which I seem to do frequently (!)...

All Hail the Beautiful Snow Day!

I find the hype created around snow storms amusing. The "Big One" was scheduled to fall on Valentines day and I heard forecasts for my area between 2 inches and 36 inches. I guess I've become skeptical of predictions because they rarely amount to anything.

The students, however, walk around the school almost carrying the excitement of possibility. Now there are a few things that create such anxiety and excitement in school: a full moon, a school scandal, the day before any vacation, and of course, the beautiful snow day!

I personally like to feed the fire. I guess I think it's much more work to squash rumors, so I generally add to weather related ones. "Yes, but I heard 48 inches!" "I think they already called school off for the next 4 days." "I hope I DON'T see you tomorrow!" "We're getting out early, but I don't know exactly what time. Make sure to pay attention to your other teachers and listen to all announcements!"

OK, perhaps this isn't the best solution but does create many humorous moments.

I also attempt to explain to my students that teachers are just as excited (maybe even more) for a snow day. For some reason that is the hardest thing for students to swallow, believing that most teachers have no first name and sleep under their desks. It's true, though. I hope for snow days - yes, I even pray! What is it about a snow day that seems to right all wrongs? Could it be as simple as a break in routine? Perhaps it's much needed rest for the weary. I'm not sure I'll ever know why, but I do know that all teachers hail a beautiful snow day!

The "Big One" did hit our area hard yesterday! I think now that all is said and done, we got about 36 inches dropped on our small town.

Death to Smoochie

When I moved into my new room at the beginning of the school year, I had no idea that I had moved into makeout alley! I guess the hallway right outside my door is the best place to sneak a little (or big!) smoochie from your honey...

I've been counting the number of times today that I have been subjected to a public display of affection in the hallways. I'm not really in the hallways all that often as I'm most often teaching in my room! Considering that I may spend a total of 20 minutes (at the most!) in the hallway, seeing 9 couples going at it is excessive!

Perhaps I should turn the tables some day...Imagine the "shock and awe" that might occur if students witnessed their teachers kissing a significant other in the hallway between classes. I am quite convinced that I would get several dirty looks, inappropriate comments and a trip to the main office - not mention a permanent nickname that I may never know.

Last year we tried to convice the married couple on staff to kiss a little during one of the lunch periods...just to give the students a taste of what it's like. It didn't actually work out - the couple wasn't so thrilled about the idea!

Do you suppose I could write off a camera phone on my taxes? I'd love to send a snap shot home with the caption, "Do you know what your child is doing at school?" I wonder how that would go over...

Don't Forget to Write Your Name on Your Paper!

I suppose my pet peeve is taking time to methodically check a homework assignment only to find that the paper has no owner. Okay, so I'm sure the paper actually had an owner but the owner chose not to identify themselves. I often remind students that I put unidentified homework papers (UHP's) in my circular file (trash can).

One of my creative students took this a little too far the other day. I noticed this, normally "not so motivated" student working diligently on his review problems in class the other day. I decided to walk by to encourage him and ask if he had any questions. As I got near, I noticed that the student had created a magnificent graffitti drawing of his name covering the whole paper! Somewhat peeved, I asked him if he would consider getting to the actual math problems...

His answer: "What? I was just putting my name on my paper."

A laugh is worth a thousand tears...

Perspective is of utmost importance - especially in the education world. As I work daily with colleagues committed to the education of tomorrow's leaders, I also see numerous students committed to the undoing of those same educators.

I've come to understand (in my few years of teaching) how important humor is to my sanity. Teacher, parent, counselor, motivator, provider, psychologist, disciplinarian, creator, specialist, consultant...just a few of the roles I play each day. Education is serious business, but I choose not to take it too seriously.

I think it's entirely possible that I've been put into the education world to keep people laughing. Edu-giggle is my attempt to keep track of the unexpected, unwarranted and plain hilarious situations I come across every day. Please feel free to send me your stories...I'd be happy to include them in the hilarity!

Enjoy!